Heartache

It is now day two since my break-up and my anxiety, though lessened is still present. My eating and sleeping habits are not what they should be and this overall sense of "ick" is enough to drive me mad. I've decided to keep a blog as a way to work through my heartache and as a way to track my journey to the love I know is coming in the near future.

I'm struggling with my feelings because I know I have made the right decision in separating from the man I was involved with for the past four months and yet a very dominate part of my being longs to be with him. He has a great deal of qualities as a person. Many of which I am looking for in a life-long partner.

Seven months seems like an eternity right now. You see, I will meet my husband in seven months. I suppose when compared to years, seven months really isn't long at all. It's the fact that I want love and commitment now and the fact that I had something similar to it just recently. It would have been easy to stay with ... I'll call him "Kindred" but I feel it would have made things worse down the road when the time came to separate. Sometimes two people are not meant to be, and no amount of effort can change the tides of fate.

There's so much left to write but I will dismiss for the time being. My heart still aches but in time it will be filled with a love greater than even I can comprehend. How I know this is more than faith or hope; an inside look has granted me tidbits of the life I am to share with the man I am destined for. I just wish the time was NOW...perhaps it is time to learn the true meaning of "patience" and how it is a virtue.